Hypnosis Journal Week 3 - Jan 15 to Jan 21

Jan 15th

Spent most the day watching playoff football, plus I'm still not feeling 100%. Just very tired. Had a little time late so tried Nothing but Blank at the recommendation of someone on Discord. As the title suggests, it takes you down and has you go blank with no awakener, letting you come back up on your own. I put it in a playlist with my new weekly plan. Sundays will start with Consent is a Key. Nothing but Blank was great. Very relaxing, took me deep, was a nice setup. Plan to use it again as a "pre-game" for other files, but don't want to overuse it and make it too memorable. I find when I listen to the same files too often I start predicting the words instead of listening. Should probably look into if that's a good thing or not, in my mind it isn't but maybe I'm wrong.

When I came up I was very aroused and wound up edging for a few minutes before I finally stopped myself and picked another file. I tried HypnoVirus Returns, but again was interrupted. Not sure what it is about that file but I can't seem to get through it. Getting pretty fucking annoying.

Jan 16th

In the afternoon I listened to Relaxation Induction as part of the weekly training. I'm liking this weekly thing I'm doing. Each one is simple and relaxing and reinforcing the trance trigger. Feel like it's establishing a nice base for me.

Later at night had some time and tried HypnoVirus Returns yet again, this time the cat was going crazy with a ping pong ball. I am not meant to listen to this file. Switched to a podcast until she settled down, but instead of trying again went to the first HypnoVirus and got through that fine. Just like the first time, really felt like I was on edge without even touching and was incredibly turned on when I came up, so wound up edging for a little while. After another start and stop, and ensuing break, I finally got through the Returns file! Now that I did, I find it pretty funny how I kept getting interrupted. It's similar to the first Virus, except this time she has me touch myself and eventually cum! Time to reset the clock, last orgasm was 1/16. If I had known, probably would have skipped this file, but at the same time it felt incredible! Was very relaxed afterwards even though I had a mess to clean up after coming up. Also the file only came through the right ear for the first few minutes. Don't think it's intentional, but since I probably won't listen to this one much, if ever, not going to worry about it.

Jan 17th

At lunchtime listened to Inevitable Trigger. Nice, relaxing trance and further reinforcement of the trance trigger. Bonus of some fractionation at the end. Still feeling a little floaty from it, which is probably not helpful for a work meeting I have soon.

Since I had a surprise orgasm yesterday, figured I better get back to basics. In the afternoon I listened to Denied to remind me it's better to edge than to cum. Can definitely feel a difference dropping each time with the trigger. Feels like it's getting easier and easier. Also I was surprised when I went under this time my cock got hard immediately. There weren't any suggestions, it just happened. This file also puts the fantasy in my head of someone controlling my mind, controlling me, never letting me orgasm, constantly teasing, always horny, always on edge. A guy can dream.

Jan 18th

Today's weekly file is Powerless. Feel like this schedule is working well. One base refresher file, than another one or two later in the day if I have time. At this point just hearing her voice starts to put me under. Once I hear the trigger I'm down. As an aside, some files have versions for either good boy or toy. Being a man, I went with the boy ones but thinking of switching to the toy versions since there was a trigger to give pleasure when hearing it and so far it's working.

In the afternoon I tried HypnoVirus Mutation, and even though I had my phone muted, a call came in and the ringtone started playing on my headphones. What the fuck?! I was two thirds through, very turned on, but now my head is cloudy and I'm kinda pissed. And of course it was a spam call anyway. Thinking I need something other than my phone, or maybe an old phone I might still have that has no service, or just use airplane mode. Bah. Too angry to even try again right now.

Now I'm doing phone testing. There's a do not disturb, but it still blips the audio when a call comes in. WTF?! Looks like airplane mode is the winner. So fucking stupid.

Jan 19th

Initially I was going to have Falling to Pieces 3 as the weekly file, until I realized while listening she installs an awake trigger, which now brings me up during the install part. A bit confusing, so I think repeated listening won't be super beneficial. So shifted days and went to Good Boy instead. A little later in the afternoon I listened to Good Boys Get Afflicted to reinforce needing permission to orgasm. Speaking of, guess I'm still building back up because I haven't done too much edging. Also my mood is a little down this week, which doesn't help with sexy fun times.

Later I gave another try at HypnoVirus Mutation and was able to get through it without any interruptions! I'm enjoying these HypnoVirus files. it includes it's own trigger related to the virus and I can actually feel it throughout my body when she says it. This mutation requires my arousal. On a scale of one to ten where one is nothing and ten is an orgasm, it requires a minimum of five constantly. When I came up I was so hard and turned on and have been having a difficult time not touching myself since. So forget what I said earlier about not much edging, I guess. We'll see how this affects me longer term, but plan on coming back to this one fairly often.

Jan 20th

Had a busy morning but in the late afternoon went to one of my favorites, Good Boys Get Fractionated. Followed that up with Trance.rora which adds a new trance trigger and treats it like installing a program, making me a trance bot. I'm only aware of one other file that follows this format. Went very deep, but testing the trigger after wasn't as effective as the main trigger she uses. Probably just need some more listens.

Also my copy of Mind Play arrived today. Looking forward to read it and hopefully pick up some tips.

Jan 21st

First half of the day was spent doing errands/chores and the second half was football. Eagles smashed the Giants, so it wasn't a total waste. Point is no time for hypno today. Ironically, I tend to have more time to myself on weekdays than weekends. Should probably adjust my weekly training schedule accordingly. Also my libido is still pretty low, so not much edging going on and last orgasm was still the 16th.

Hypnosis Journal Week 2 - Jan 8 to Jan 14

Jan 8th

Had some time to myself this morning so put on Snap Fractionation since I've recently discovered it's my favorite thing, but my dogs are jerks so I had to stop right as I was about to go under. Hid away to a spare bedroom to try again and went undisturbed. Not sure how much I liked the tease to go under, much prefer the tease of coming back up, but can see the appeal from the hypnotists' point of view. Was a little frustrating in a fun way. Think I need more conditioning for the snaps to be more effective, but I was thrilled the "evil" whisper voice was back.

After that I tried Deeper, which I didn't realize had some light fractionation as well. Introduced a new trance trigger, but it was only temporary for this file, which is a shame. Overall, it was effective for me.

Followed that up with Deeply Submissive. Wasn't exactly what I expected, but that wasn't a bad thing. Dealt more with orgasm denial and reminding me that edging is better than cumming, essentially. Also had binaurals, which I found were a bit too loud to start, but either they softened or I adapted.

At this point I knew I should go and do some yardwork, but where's the fun in that? So I tried the re-download of Hypnovirus and thankfully this didn't have the partial other session tacked on at the end. Wasn't as good as last night, as in I didn't feel like I was super on edge, but it was still effective. I was then going to move on to Hypnovirus Returns, but only got a couple minutes in before my dogs were assholes again, barking up a storm. Gave up at that point to rake some leaves and hurt my back, apparently.

I really need to map out a plan. Right now I'm picking files a bit too randomly. Also maybe dial back a bit. I try to take advantage of the time I get, but wonder if I'm doing too many at once. Maybe with a better plan it won't feel that way. During the Eagles game this afternoon I might try and come up with a roadmap for me going forward. Overall, I'm thrilled with the progress I've made. I'm sure the fact I've listened off and on for years now has helped. Also, almost a week since my last orgasm with edging sessions a couple times a day. So far doing fine with it. Far from my record of just over a month. Not necessarily trying to break it this time, just playing it by ear.

Jan 9th

Didn't listen to anything before bed and slept a little better. Coincidence? Still mapping out a plan. Thinking some kind of base to reinforce basic things, maybe certain files each day but only once a week so they don't get too repetitive. Like a base Monday file, Tuesday file, etc and then anything else I have time for after is gravy (and hopefully fun!).

As I go through figuring out my mapping, I tried New to Hypno? to see if it should be included. It is a great file for new users, and something that would make a nice refresher once in awhile, but don't think I need it weekly at this point. Just a nice chat in the beginning, simple relaxing induction and then brought back up.

Jan 10th

Once again skipped any late night listening. I was already pretty tired. At some time during the night something got knocked over, which spooked the dogs, and they spent the rest of the night pushed up against me, along with one of the cats, so not great sleep for me again. This morning I tried a file that is not on her current website, maybe I got it from her old one? It's titled Inevitable Trigger. I wasn't in the right headspace for it, but it's another good intro file reinforcing the trance trigger, so may add it to the weekly rotation.

In the afternoon tried Come in from the Cold. Standalone file that has you experiencing cold sensations. I was able to visualize snow pretty well, don't recall feeling anything but then don't remember the last couple minutes of the file either. Just came up when she told me to, so something to try again later. I then tried Consent is Key. Once again reinforcing the trance trigger and also adds a pleasure trigger, so this will probably go into the weekly rotation. It also deals with, as the title suggests, consent and giving her a key to mine. Very nice file.

Finished up by going back to Relaxation Induction. Blanked out again for a good chunk of it, came back when she brought me up and at the exact same time my dog started licking my arm. So not sure who really brought me back. My dogs are not cooperating at all on this journey! Think I'm close to mapping out my weekly files, then I can start adding on the more fun ones once I feel I'm ready, which I'm starting to think I'm very close to being. That is assuming my dogs ever allow it.

Jan 11th

Today was rough. Work was non-stop meetings and I was mentally wiped afterwards. Even had to skip my workout, another thing I'm trying to get back into. Was able to have a couple edging sessions during the day and another restless night resulted in me waking up at least twice and edging some more. Coming up on ten days with no orgasms but lots of edges. Toying with the idea of waiting and see if one of the files can make me cum.

Jan 12th

Another busy day. In the afternoon I wanted to listen to a file titled Control, which is an older one no longer on her site and separate from the Control Series, as far as I know. Still not sure because like an idiot I forgot to mute my phone, which I use to listen, and got a very loud text notification about a third of the way in. Short time later I didn't want to repeat the same file, so tried Powerless, and this might be in the running for another weekly listen. It reinforces the trance trigger. Pretty sure I had more to say, but either it didn't save or I forgot, and now it's a couple days later. I need to get better at recording my thoughts right away.

Jan 13th

Friday the 13th and I have a cold or something. Covid test was negative, so yay, but I logged off work early and got in bed to watch a movie, then put on a playlist of files. I went with Good Boys Get Fractionated the asleep version, then Worship, At My Feet, Rub My Feet, and finally Wax Play, which apparently is an older file and not on her current site. Started off well enough as I enjoy the fractionation. From there it went downhill. Worship wants me to physically get on my knees, which at the time I was unable to do. The next two files are more about putting me in a fantasy, which I don't think I'm ready for yet. I know it's not real and I'm unable to let my mind be fooled into thinking otherwise for now. At that point I was getting really warm under the covers and a bit frustrated so ended it for the day.

Jan 14th

Another busy day, so no time for any files.

Overall, a disappointing week. Just not enough hours in the day for me. I did come up with files I want to train with weekly, but not the order yet. Hoping to sort that out on Sunday and go from there. Should also note still no orgasm since the 2nd, but lots of short edging sessions since then. Feel like every night I wake up at least once and edge for a short while before I force myself to stop and try and get more sleep. Not as desperate as I thought I'd be, but the smallest things are turning me on. Getting hard just typing this, for example.

Hypnosis Journal Week 1 - Jan 1 to Jan 7

I’ve dabbled with erotic hypnosis for many years, but never really had the time or opportunity to stick with it. Nikki Fatale was my initial introduction. Her voice and style was simply amazing. Hearing her say, “Sleep” and a snap would have me slipping down so easily, but like I said I was never able to consistently stay with it. After her I found the Warp My Mind site. Those files promised amazing sounding “curses” but were voiced by a man, which for me was not effective nor desired. Over the years since, I’ve discovered many, many different erotic hypnotists. Some I enjoyed their style but the content didn’t always match my kinks, or the opposite would be true. I have an embarrassingly large 185 GB collection of hypno MP3s and videos from various sources, the large majority I’ve never even listened to (I'm a bit of a virtual hoarder).

The past year was rough personally, so I got away from most of my online kinky fun. Stopped creating captioned photos. Didn’t write any stories. Didn’t even engage in one of my favorite fetishes, edging and denying myself. I was just cumming all willy nilly whenever. With the new year things are settling down and I’m feeling more myself again, so I’m making a serious, conscious effort. I've started creating a caption backlog so I can start posting again to my BDSMlr page. Trying to finish some of the stories I started and dropped for whatever reason and get them posted here and on Literotica (and get my backlog on there too). And of course the point of this journal, getting back into erotic hypnosis and really trying to train myself.

Almost exactly one year ago I came across a hypnotist on Reddit, I think, who goes by Lady Aurora. Her files were very short compared to others I've seen, so with shorter inductions than I was used to I questioned how effective it would be for me, but many of the files catered to my denial fetish so I gave them a try. I enjoyed them so much that when she created a website I signed up at the highest tier for several months. She also had a Discord server at the time that I joined, but didn't interact much, if at all. That's also around the time life went sideways, so while I was still a member and collecting available files, I had no time or desire to listen.

Around a week ago I was looking on Reddit and stumbled on Aurora's post titled Do you want your orgasms to be controlled... by a machine? Naturally, I was intrigued and found she created a new Discord server, so I joined. Thanks to some social anxiety issues, I'm not sure how well I'm fitting in, but seeing how others are conditioned and enjoying hypnosis it's encouraging me to give it another try. Another user is logging their journey, so I'm stealing that idea for myself. Starting off focusing on Aurora's files to keep a consistent voice/triggers in my head. Then plan to expand to Miss Lilith who also has many denial themes, a British accent, and uses many effects that I would normally find off-putting but for some reason really helps to bring me down. After that not sure if I'll explore further or not. Ideally I'd like to try a one-on-one live session, either in person or online, but the reality of that may not be feasible. For now, baby steps.

I'm not a fan of New Year's resolutions and never do them, so the fact I started this on January 1st is pure coincidence. My notes and recollections for the first few days may be a little hazy. Wasn't planning on doing this at first. Then thought I should at least track the files and make note of which I liked and didn't so I could repeat the good and ignore the "bad." Then realized I should keep more detailed notes. All that means this first post will contain a lot of files, but the details may be lacking. My plan is to track my experiences daily, but post weekly.

That being said, here's week one of my journey! Should also note that there may be some spoilers for files I listen to. I'll do my best not to ruin them too much, but it's pretty hard to discuss my experience without explaining them sometimes.

Jan 1st

Sunday holiday. Watched the Eagles lay an egg and had a little time to myself. Started with Good Boy. Figured that's a good starter file that gives a trance trigger that's used in other files later. Anytime I hear "Good boy" I can feel a little smile form on my lips. Followed that immediately with Good Boys Get Afflicted which builds on the first one and adds an orgasm restriction that I need permission from someone. This works well with the Orgasm Donation Program I entered in Discord (every edging session where you don't orgasm you can donate and you can ask a bot permission to cum but must abide by it). After that I went into Pleasure Compulsion which associates pleasure when saying her name (while writing this, just discovered there's a no safeword version I should get). And finally I went to Good Boys Get Enslaved which again adds more to the Good Boy theme and reinforces the needing permission to orgasm. It's been a few days, so don't really remember how I felt or even how effective they were. Will most likely go back to these often as a base, unless I find some that are more appropriate.

Jan 2nd

Back to work, even though I work from home. Didn't have a chance to listen to any hypno, but I began catching up with a voice artist I was friendly with before life got in the way. She encouraged me to try writing scripts for voice artists and even record my own stuff (just a couple ramblefaps of me edging here and here, but it was a start), but unfortunately never got very far with it. She was also kind enough to voice a modified version of Cal's Curse for me, including a personalized one with my name. Something I need to get back to at some point. Wound up edging for a bit, asked the bot for permission and got it. In the moment was glad but afterwards disappointed. Maybe i need someone/something else to give me permission to ask?

Jan 3rd

The beauty of the shorter files is I can sneak some in during the day. A quick break at my desk. Went with Good Boy again to help reinforce the trance trigger. Later in the day tried Aurora Takes Your Agency. There is another file called Aurora on Agency that explains the listeners ability to still have control. Be able to wake on your own and resist suggestions. The one I listened to is the same file with an "evil" voice whispering throughout, essentially countermining everything the main voice is saying. At one point I'm to wake on my own, but the whispers told me not to so I obeyed and stayed under. Later she gave a suggestion I was supposed to resist to strip my clothes off, but the whisper voice told me to do it so I did. I was then brought back up and was in my desk chair completely nude. I remember doing everything, but often can't tell if I'm playing along or not. Am I obeying because I want to or because I want this to be working or is it simply working and I'm overthinking it, or maybe it's all the same thing?

Later that night I tried an edit I made a while back. I took a few of the Good Boy files and edited them together, making a longer induction essentially. It was a bad idea and waste of time. Wound up deleting it. Then went to Focus which is another file telling me I cannot orgasm without permission. The original file has an out, a safeword to end the denial, but I edited that out so the file I have no longer contains the safeword. Did I mention how much I enjoy tease and denial? Anyway, the thing that surprised me is the small fractionation in the file and how much I enjoyed it. Previously I was never a fan of it and tended to avoid it. In my head, I needed longer inductions to relax and go down and coming back up "broke the spell" for me. This time it was pretty effective and felt kind of amazing. Something I want to explore later. I then put on a Naughty Loops file that was discussed earlier in Discord. Aurora had someone listen as "punishment." I enjoyed the beginning and end of the file, but when the voices began overlapping it was a bit too much, and not in a fun way. Nothing bad, just sounded like nonsense with a few words coming through. I'll probably try it again some other time, but this time it was more annoying than anything else.

That night I had difficulty going to sleep. I was lying in bed and wide awake. Considered getting up and playing PlayStation but grabbed my headphones instead. I put on Down the Rabbithole - No Safeties asleepener version. This file gives a compulsion to edge and avoid orgasm with no safeword (noticing a theme with me?) and at the end has you go to sleep. The good news is it helped me fall asleep, the bad is the suggestion to have sexy dreams didn't take.

Jan 4th

During the day I looped Hypnotic Acceptance by Miss Lilith. It's a passive loop meant to strip away resistance to all sorts of hypnosis and suggestions. I was able to listen while I worked during the morning. Thought I'd have time in the afternoon for some more active listening, but work got hectic. Other companies blaming their problems on us and an incompetent tech brought something down. Was not a fun afternoon.

Recreational marijuana recently became legal in my state. I never used it before (I'm such a good boy!) so a month ago got some edibles (I loathe smoking in any form). So I had one to relax and after dinner decided to try some files while "under the influence." I played four back-to-back. Started with Open Wide, as Aurora that day on Discord mentioned it was one of her favorites. Don't recall much about it, probably need to try it again. Followed that with Good Boys Get Fractionated and holy shit was that fun! Think I'm now a fan of fractionation. Especially enjoyed when she counted up, never let me get fully up, and then sent me back down. Tempted to edit together a longer version. After that went back to Down the Rabbithole - No Safeties but the awakener version this time. When I came up I was pretty aroused and touching myself a bit. Before I got too carried away I put on Good Boys Get Enslaved. This time when I came up I couldn't resist touching and edging myself. I was still pretty fuzzy and got an alert from the Discord channel of a "nude flash" so checked it out. Someone posted an amazingly sexy vid of themselves which only helped to fuel my current state. I was eventually able to get myself under control and shared my experience there. Felt like that went over like a fart in church which was another factor in getting me to start this journal here. Overall, it was an amazing experience. I remember at one point going down, in my mind I pictured diving into water and going super deep. I can still visualize that a few days later. Something I may cling to anytime I go under now. Just typing that is making me a little fuzzy and aroused.

Jan 5th

I forgot Aurora has her own passive file, In the Background (Triple Voice). Gave it a listen once during work, then in the afternoon had time so went with Falling to Pieces Vol 1 - Pleasure Snaps. Not sure how deep I really went or how effective it was for me. It's supposed to provide pleasure when she snaps her fingers. Worked a little I think, but will need to try again. Also this is meant to be modular, but I listened to the full file which has an asleepener at the end after coming up. I simply stopped the file first, but will probably want to use a playlist or edit to remove to make things easier for me. Second file is the same modular format, Falling to Pieces Vol 3 - Trance & Awake. This one deals with fractionation and establishes, or in my case reinforced, the trance trigger but also adds an awake trigger. This one worked fairly well for me and my mind felt a little fuzzy for a few hours after. Can't believe I've been avoiding and missing out on fractionation all this time! Also thinking if there's a file I really want to work/stick for me I should "pre-game" with some fractionation and take advantage of some of the modular files she has. Lots to think about here.

Jan 6th

Didn't sleep well last night. That's the second time this week. Hoping it's not related and just one of those things. I woke up around 3 or 4 AM and was pretty horny so wound up edging myself for like a half hour. Never had much time during the day for anything. Stumbled across some hypno web games that seem interesting and found a good article on how to be a better subject.

Right before bed I took a little time and listened to Pleasure Reflection. Basically spent the entire file edging myself and denied at the end while I got to listen to Aurora orgasm instead, which definitely works for me since my favorite sound is a woman having an orgasm. I then put Objectified Slave on a loop. I liked the idea of listening to that as I go to sleep, but unfortunately it's impractical with my bulky noise cancelling headphones. I have some in-ear ones, but feel like seeping in them is a bad idea. Maybe I'll see if there's a better option. Also wondering if pre-gaming with another file and then going to this in a playlist to loop would be interesting. More things to ponder. So after like three or four loops, I went back to Down the Rabbithole - No Safeties asleepener version. Once again it helped me drift to sleep. Still no fun dreams I can remember. Also I'm hazy if I woke in the middle of the night again and edged some more, but I definitely did this morning. My last orgasm was on the 2nd and I've "donated" six since then (total is eight donations to one ask and granted permission). Should probably be feeling it a bit more than I am, but could just be how busy I've been.

Jan 7th

Like I said, I woke up hard so edged for a bit. Had some things to do this morning, so while I went a little longer than I should have, I did manage to pull myself away. Later on I had some time and went with Relaxation Induction. The name is accurate. Don't really remember much from the file. Sometimes I'm not sure if I actually fall asleep or my mind drifts away and I'm no longer paying attention or I'm just truly in a trance state, but I came back right when she counted me up so I'm thinking it's the last of the three. After that I went to Hypnovirus, with the thought I'd work towards Hypnovirus Amnesia, which makes you forget what an orgasm is and you think an edge is an orgasm. But baby steps. So Hypnovirus worked very well. In it I inhale the "virus" and then she touches me and brings me to the edge, closer and closer, and then denies me and counts me up. What's crazy is I really felt like I was on edge and if she commanded me to cum I would have. I've never chased an HFO (hands free orgasm) like others I've seen online. I've tried a few in the past and they've never really done much for me, but I also wasn't training as much for them either. This is definitely the closest I've felt under trance, but unfortunately (or fortunately?) I was denied so we'll never know. Once the file was done I was crazy horny and began touching myself, but apparently the file wasn't done. Another session began. I figured what the hell, and went with it, not knowing what this would entail. Well I'll never know, I went under and then it stopped. This isn't something I edited, so I guess an old version of the file had a bad edit or something? I'll need to download it again since it's free and compare. Took me a few minutes to bring myself up and by then FedEx dropped something off, making the dogs go nuts, so playtime was over.

Right before bed, I setup a playlist of the entire Control Series and then Sexy Dreams. Control is five files, all relatively short. I remember the first one, two through four only the induction and wakeups, and five I remember. It was pretty late so again unsure if I was actually asleep or trance asleep, but thinking the latter. Sexy Dreams is what you'd think, but once again I don't recall having any fun, sexy dreams. Also once again I didn't sleep very well, so starting to worry this is affecting my sleep negatively. Might need to cut back and see or refrain from listening right before bed. Could all be coincidence as I've had bouts of inconsistent sleep before, but I feel like since I started this the only night I slept really well was when I had the edible. I'll have to continue to monitor and see.

That's week one. Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I like writing it. See you next week!